This is a silly thing to write about. Really, it’s mostly for entertainment, but cyclists need to eat. And when you’re on the road, or coming back from the trailhead post-bonk, you can get a little desperate…
I’m usually shocked when the Jack-in-the-Box “taco” gets brought up in conversation. The conversation usually involves people asking the same two questions: “Is that meat?” And, “what’s with the American cheese?” Regardless of the answers for those two questions, it always resolves with everyone agreeing that those “tacos” are delicious.
Both are legitimate questions, and I don’t have an answer for either. I still eat them. I mean, I do, albeit occasionally, a few times a year. And, to quantify “a few times a year,” I would say more than 5 but less than 10.
What can I say, sometimes those lil gut bombs hit the spot. They especially hit when it’s after midnight in the wee, early morning hours. You know, when you’ve been out drinking while watching your wife do a lil’ karaoke, or you’re just out for a night on the town. That’s when those “tacos,” (I use the term taco very loosely here) are downright tasty.
Then, this Happened…
My wife is a fan of a good cheeseburger. She’s honestly a bit of a self-proclaimed connoisseur. We were out running errands, and she had a craving for one of her guilty pleasures, the Burger King Whopper Jr., so we stopped by and grabbed one. When we were in the drive-through, I noticed that they had tacos that looked eerily similar to the Jack in the Box tacos.
I ordered some, I ate them, and found them surprisingly different, and yet unexcitingly the same. I was giving my wife my thoughts when I was eating the pair of tacos, and she thought it would be a funny review for the site… so, here we are.
Let’s dive in.
The Jack in the Box “Taco”: A Culinary Phenomenon
First, let’s start with some pretty hysterical findings from a Google search, using the search prompt: “What’s the deal with Jack in the Box Tacos?”
“Objectively questionable but subjectively delicious.”
And: “Jack in the Box tacos are famous for their cult following, polarizing opinions with their unique, deep-fried, crispy-yet-soggy texture, mysterious meat filling (beef, chicken, soy protein), single slice of American cheese, lettuce, and tangy sauce, creating a nostalgic, inexpensive, “vile and amazing” fast-food experience, often enjoyed late-night or when sober, despite their questionable ingredients and unconventional style.”
These are my thoughts on the Jack in the Box “taco”, I like it. OK? I’m not proud of it, but I like it. I don’t buy it with the thought that I’m buying a taco. I actually don’t even eat it, thinking I’m eating a taco. It’s just called a taco. And I order it and call it a taco. But it’s not a freaking taco.
It tastes nothing like an authentic taco, but for some damn reason, I like it. I really like the taco sauce that comes on it, and you can get more in packets if you need to drown your sorrows in taco sauce.
God, why do I like it?
Jack in the Box Tacos Retail & Detail
Retail: $2.49 (pair)
- Unique texture and flavor
- Mystery meat
- Simple toppings
- Cult following
- Very high sales
- Not your typical taco
2 tacos come out to 340 cals, with 12 grams of protein for the pair, 32 grams of total carbohydrates, and 640 milligrams of sodium.
Burger King “Taco”: The Surprise Contender?
Let’s take a look at this “taco”. I’m calling the Burger King taco the surprise contender in this comparison simply because I didn’t know they even existed until I saw them that fateful day. And I’m not suggesting that the BK taco could even get close to de-throning Jack in the Box’s late-night “taco-thing” king.
But, I’m here to tell you that the BK taco is pretty damn good. And just barely different enough from the Jack in the Box taco to do a comparison. Some of the major differences with the BK taco are a different “meat stuff” filling that carries a more “taco-meat-like” flavor, and the sauce. The sauce is a little on the sweet side for me, but tasty.
The shell on the BK “taco” is a little better than the Jack in the Box “taco”. It’s crispier and lighter through and through, and doesn’t carry nearly as much sogginess as Jack’s.
All in all, it’s a decent contender, but it falls weirdly short in the taste department. I think it’s the taco sauce; it rubs me the wrong way.
Burger King Tacos Retail & Detail
Retail: $1 (pair)
- Light and crispy shell
- Not as much of a Mystery Meat
- Texture is a “Gooey, disappointing, confusing mess.”
- Claims “grated” cheese, still just a melted American cheese slice
- Savory taco sauce
2 tacos come out to 340 cals, with 10 grams of protein for the pair, 38 grams of total carbohydrates, and 820 milligrams of sodium.
In Conclusion…
Out of these two horrible food choices, I’d go on public record to say that they are both very similar. Each has its own highlights that are better than the other. For instance, the Burger King “taco” has a way better shell than the Jack in the Box “taco”. But the JITB “taco” has better taco sauce.
When it comes to the “meat ” in both “tacos”, the taste of the Burger King “meat” feels/tastes more like actual meat than the meat on the Jack in the Box “taco”. But I don’t trust it. Not that I really trust the Jack in the Box “meat flavored paste”, but I don’t know, I’ve been eating them for a longer period of time, so I guess it’s familiarity as opposed to “trust”.
Look, I’m not proud of the fact that I occasionally partake in either one of these “tacos”. But I’m not the only one. For Jack in the Box, their “taco” is one of the restaurant’s best sellers, and has been for years. For Burger King, their “taco” is a regional menu item that appears occasionally on their menu (Editor’s Note: Ron is based in California – a place where Jack in the Box’s are plentiful, and Burger Kings apparently have tacos). And, honestly, it tastes like it. Their commitment to make a shitty, yet delicious taco doesn’t match Jack’s commitment level.
So, in my opinion, the Jack in the Box “taco” inches out the Burger King “taco” if only because I’m so familiar with it.
So, to sum it up, the lesser of the two evil “tacos” is the Jack in the Box “taco”. I’m not proud of myself.
I hope you kinda enjoyed this ridiculous “review”, I had fun doing it. It was refreshing to write about something other than the next $10,000 bicycle.
I’m excited to see where this column goes.
